I can't see the light

For weeks I've felt lost and I can't see the light
Shining through the darkest of days
What can I do to stop myself from hiding my thoughts
From this world of lies?
I've felt so lost for far too long
Trying to leave it all behind
I find I cannot forgive myself for feeling like this
How can I even begin to forgive myself for all the things I'm thinking of doing to you?
How can I forgive myself for this?
But it's all in your head
You just walk out of my life and you expect me to let you back in
With open arms I'll turn to you
For weeks I've felt lost and I can't see the light
So I'll do this one alone
I'll hide my thoughts from you
Is it beyond impossible for me to hold on for you?
Is it beyond you to forgive me?
If not I'll do it on my own time
How can I forgive myself?
For my world is slowly falling down
And you just stand there and watch me fall