True story

This mornin' I jumped on my horse and went out for a ride
Some wild outlaws chased me and they shot me in the side
So I crawled into a wild cat's cave to find a place to hide
But some pirates found me a sleepin' there and soon they had me tied
Till a lady zombie cut me loose and begged to be my bride
So I said I'd come back Wednesday but I must admit I lied
Cause I run away into the swamp but I forgot my guide
And I stepped into some quicksand and no matter how I tried
I couldn't get out until I met a crocodile named Clyde
Who took me to some cannibals who planned to have me fried
They built a fire under me and I swear I almost cried
Till an eagle come and swooped me up and through the air we flied
But he dropped me in a boilin' lake a thousand miles wide
And you know what happened then I died