A grim christmas story

On the first day of Christimas
My true love said to me
Oh Sarah, my sweet pea
On the second day of Christmas
My true love lied to me
Oh, what a pity
Now he lies on the bottom of the sea

On the third day of Christmas
The milkman come to see
If my husband was home
For a pint of beer
The question he popped and
My jaws nearly dropped!
Oh, what a pity, he had it coming
Now there's two on the bottom of the sea

On the fourth day of Christmas
The milkman's wife come by
Worried to her bones she was
Of her husband's life
A blow to her head
It made everything all right
Oh what a pity, she had it coming
A knife cut her throat
Now there's three on the bottom of the sea

On the fifth day of Christmas
My true love got revealed
He was keen on something else
Than his wife... that's me!
I went to see his mistress
Just to have a talk
Then I went home... Or not!
That was not a pity
Chopped her like meat
Put her in a sack
Now there's four on the bottom of the sea

On the sixth day of Christmas
A man knocked on my door
Asked for my husban, my true love
Damn, what a pity
This is getting messy
Strangled him to death
Now there's five on the bottom of the sea

On the seventh day of Christmas
The police knocked my door
Told me the milkman's son
Had given them a call
By asking some questions
They found out what I'd done
Oh, what a pity, end of my story
Sarah's going to jail!

Quickly I came up with a cunning plan
Look at the time
It's almost five
I bring you tea
With a special treat!

The poison made them sleep
A dagger made them bleed
Time for me to flee!
Now there's eight on the bottom of the sea
Yes there's eight on the bottom of the sea!