Dr. west (skit)

Eminem: Morning Doc.

Dr. West: So we're discharging you today, how are you
feeling?

Eminem: Uh anxious.

Dr. West: Anxiety...

Eminem: Well, anxious to get home, anxious to get back
into the world... nervous-

Dr. West: Nervous? Come on Marshall, you're a big boy
now... Sounded like a bit of a baby, you can do this.
You found a sponsor yet?

Eminem: No um, not yet but when I get ba-

Dr. West: Well if you find one, you find one, If you
don't, you don't.

Eminem: Well yeah, I mean I got to start going to
meetings first and- wait, what?

Dr. West: Well, I mean you don't absolutely have to go
to meetings, I mean it's not like... a requirement...
If they fit into your schedule, I know you're a busy
person.

Eminem: Well yeah but... I thought sobriety was the
most important thing-

Dr. West: So what else are you thinking?

Eminem: Um, well I know I got to start practicing the
steps and, I mean learn them and start being able to
apply them-

Dr. West: The steps...

Eminem: Yeah, the steps?

Dr. West: There's alot of them aren't there?

Eminem: Well, 12 but-

Dr. West: Christ, I don't even know them all.

Eminem: Really...

Dr. West: Anything else?

Eminem: Um, well I mean the only other question I have
is, like what do I do if I find myself in the situation
where maybe somebody's drinking around me or something
like that, and I get tempted to-

Dr. West: Take a drink.

Eminem: What?

Dr. West: Take a drink! And you know, and... take the
edge off.

Eminem: Take the edge off? Man if I have a drink, I
already know what that's going to lead me to...

Dr. West: What, you mean these?

Eminem: Now what the fuck!?

Dr. West: MARSHALL, WHAT'S THE MATTER DARLING? HAVING
SOME DOUBTS ARE WE?

Eminem: Oh no, NO, NO COME ON MAN!

Dr. West: MARSHALL, YOU CAN'T BEAT ME, YOU'LL NEVER
BEAT ME MARSHALL, WE'LL ALWAYS BE TOGETHER MARSHALL.
MARSHALL! MARSHAAAAALL!

Eminem: Oh fuck you man... NO! NO! NO!
NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!... Oh shit.