Kung-fu vs to-fu

One day while, cruisin' round, i bumped into this fat-ass kid.
He reacted, quite uptight, so i doofered him laxative.
"Your're dead meat to be" he poetically said.
So I crawled on my bike, hit my peddles and fled.

"You can run but you can't hide he said and I thaught he had a point,
so I want right back and stood up to this moronic goon from hell.

But boy was I wrong , oh so wrong...
This bully sure kicked my butt...
Short and sweet, but so hard...
He bashed me right off my feet.

No ninja turtles appeard at the scene
The result was the most pathetic fight ever seen !

If you can't run and you can't hide you might as well prepare to die
Cause if they label you a wuss and you know the reason why...
You're not aware of kung fu or any martial arts at all,
And you're mommy feeds you Tofu so forever you'll stay small...

I'm not a happy camper not today cause i'm in pain,
Now I realise what I did back there was insane!