(lord it's hard to be happy when you're not) using the metric system

12 Inches per foot,
2 Pints per quart,
Why don't we make it easy?
The english system of measurement must be laid to history,
We can use units of 10 and convert with ease,
Just like all the other countries,
I am in command yes I am taking a stand,
From this disease we must be free! (good god!)

You are drunk with your tradition that has no validity,
While I'm intoxicated with smarts and metrics,
Come drink a dekaliter with me.
We want metrics, we want them now! We know we can win!
I weigh 170 lbs. That's 90 kilograms,
See metrics can even make me thin

(Yardsticks are pathetic)

All cool things are in metrics,
For example here's just one,
I got my "nine" well that's nine millimeters,
Sounds cooler then my.3 something inches gun!
The powerful, if non-existent "they" will call me communist,
They'll call me scum, but it's worth it,
Canadians will think we're smart or at least not as dumb,

The revolution's here,
We must overcome at last,
As we symbolically stick their 12 inch foot up their antiquate ass... Guitar!