On death & endearments

Gentlemen please rise
In light of why we're gathered here tonight
This is it though I'm shit with goodbyes
Suffice to say well I haven't much time

So how I chose and choose
To make use of this life allotted me
Well you few know and knew
And each played to me begrudging accessory

So I should think it wise
In debt to your unseemly sacrifice
To see that when I die
None of my sordid scenes come to life

For me I see no need
To catalog what deeds I may have done
If we'll all agree to keep
These terms of my demise unclarified

History
She will surely forgive me
And history
She will think of me fondly
And once I had half reminds to just apologize
In days less dignified
Before I knew what to
And not to do

But sure of course there's shame
In certain things I may have done
But shame is not remorse
And pandering's the one thing even I can't afford

Measure me in grief
Survived in score by prideful progeny
And I though sometimes weak
Still shudder to speak these secrets we keep

For their sake let me stay
Ostensibly the saint I seem to be
For now my nose is clean
So bury these peculiarities with me

History
She will surely forgive me
And history
She will scarcely forget me

So no tearful goodbyes
In light of why we're gathered here tonight
To you whom I confide
Suffice to say well I haven't much time