The art of losing

I'm not fucking blind to the way
That you talk around the truth
Not just what you say
But what you do
Played this tug of war way too fucking long
Like every time
Again I've lost
You've won
You took advantage of the trust that I gave
Took my forgiveness
Rubbed it back in my face
Reaching for words but there's nothing to say
I'm left to wonder
Will this ever be the same
This rage
Burning through my veins
Regret consumes my mind
Cutting deeply like a razor blade
Will I live to see another day
Without questioning your motives
With constant doubt
You took advantage of the trust that I gave
Took my forgiveness
Rubbed it back in my face
Reaching for words
But there's nothing to say
I'm left to wonder
Will this ever be the same
And as we sit back waiting
For these scars to heal
Try to convince ourselves
That this
That this isn't real
Will you allow me forget your past
Or will you always hang it over my head