Abélard and heloise

I remove to a distance from your person
With an intention of avoiding you as an enemy
And yet I incessantly seek for you in my mind
I recall your image in my memory
And in different disquietudes I betray and contradict myself
I hate you! I love you!

But if I lose you, what have I left to hope for?
Why continue on life's pilgrimage
For which I have no support but you
And none in you save the knowledge that you are alive
Now that I am forbidden all other pleasures in you
And denied even the joy of your presence
Which from time to time could restore me to myself?

I am at this moment afraid I should seem more indifferent than you fare
And yet I am ashamed to discover my trouble

Ah, Heloise, how far are we from such a happy temper?

Your heart still burns with that fatal fire you cannot extinguish
And mine is full of trouble and unrest

Think not, Heloise, that I here enjoy a perfect peace
I will for the last time open my heart to you
I am not yet disengaged from you
And though I fight against my excessive tenderness for you
In spite of all my endeavours I remain but too sensible of your sorrows
And long to share in them

The hollow bell rings
The cloistered hearts yearn to forget
These mournful but dear remembrances
Sought solace never met

I promise myself that I will forget, yet I cannot
Your words that burn within my heart my bitter tears shall blot
The tree from which I tasted fruit displays now naught but leaves
This history of misfortunes made my heart bleed within me

My heart is pierced with your sorrows, pierced with mine own
With my face pressed I mix my tears with earth, the earth my home
When all is finished, you'll be near, cold ashes need not fear
My tomb shall be the richer for them, lover ever near

The violent motion of my heart
Our sufferings and revolutions
Though time aught to have closed my wounds
They open up and bleed afresh
Your words sufficient, they bleed afresh

Cold ashes need not fill
Our sufferings and revolutions