This wake i myself have stirred

Afraid to turn.
But I did and met no maker at all.
Only instead, reflections of a rippled self.
I may at last see myself as good
In a neutral pond unbiased and real
Depicting only what is true.
A distortion my hand has forced.
I have created the wake.
I may at last see myself as good.
Paint a false scenario.
My life has been a breach of contract and faith.
I kid myself.
Moving through self degradation.
I turn to you for appreciation.
So help me to help myself.
So help me to love myself.