My favorite mistake was you

alone at night i think about what i'd do
if the person i was meant to be - ever shines through
how i spend my days trying to be
the kind of kid that you want close to you
and i kno how this one ends
we want the ones that we can't have
so what the fuck is wrong with me?
why can't i let go of you?
the first time all i saw were your eyes
and now i can't stand to look inside them
it's not your distance that's killing me
it's being close to you that makes me close to myself
and i can't stand the way i am
i push away the ones who love me
and i embrace the apathy
and hang from all your lies
and if i could i'd take back my words
and heal my heart
if i could i'd take back the secrets
my stiched up heart
if i could i'd forget your face
a brand new start
if i could i'd show you how
you tore me apart