A dog's life

Lead it outside in the sun.
When I called it, it would not come.
Paint its face up nicely,
Tie its hair up in a curl.
Paint its lipstick bright red,
Wipe the drool up gently.

Not like all the others,
Just one of life's winners
Made of something better.

So throw the ball up into space,
Hold the phone up to its face.
Lead it outside in the rain,
Tie it up and bat pat its head.
Never speak of it again.