Whispering insomnia

They think they eradicate their impact on the things that make me fail
Another useless trial on facing another day
How are my defects fixed if I can't exclude their faces away
This erratic puzzle I cannot solve today

And as I walk around all the thoughts are brought back to my mind
I can't ignore I feel why the fuck I've been so blind
No direct accusations but silent threats connected to no one
This obstinate depravity inside is what I have become

"I am now asleep, yet awake in a sense
Gazing at the gate to another difference
The portal opens, revealing a new dimension
But I turn away - there's so much I have left undone"

Now that I have closed the gate that would grant me another way:
To relinquish my entity and embrace nothing I could serve today
There is only another option I have outruled ever since day one
I have to save some closure on matters I never though to be done