Washington crossed the delaware river
Washington acted like a rock star
Washington made america deliver
Washington tried to be a rock star

But all the fame that he had won
It wasn't really any fun
Soon the people started turning
Whoa-oa-oa

That boy who couldn't tell a lie
Two terms and then he said goodbye
Georgie went back to mount vernon
Whaaaaaaaow!

Why don't you just shoot me in the head
'Cause you know I'd be better off dead
If there's really no place in america
For a celebrity of the first rank.

Spoken:
Ladies and gentlemen, governor andrew jaackson!! Yea-ea!

That's right mother fuckers. Oackson's back. one-two-three...

Sung:
John addams tried to be an american idol
Jefferson tried to be a rock star
Madison tried to make the presidency vital
And james monroe was a douche bag

The story always ends the same
It's hard to handle all that fame
You don't really have it in you
Whoa-oa-oa

There's no place in democracy
For your brand of aristocracy
Take that shit back to virginia
(Or massachusetts be-yotch!)

Why don't you just shoot me in the head
'Cause you know I'd be better off dead
If there's really no place in america
For a celebrity of the first rank.

Overlapping
Chorus
You can't just be a founding father
When everybody wants you to be their father
You can't just be a founding father
When everybody needs you to be their father

Jackson
Would you like to see my stimulus package?
I'm gonna fill you with popula-jizz-m

Unison
Why don't you just shoot me in the head
'Cause you know I'd be better off dead
If there's really no place in america
For a celebrity of the first...

Overlapping
Why don't you just shoot me in the head
'Cause you know I'd be better off dead
If there's really no place in america
For a celebrity of the first...

You can't just be a founding father
When everybody wants you to be their father

Whoa-oa-oa
One all man band can take its toll
The people push it to unfold
The series equals a new government
Whoa-oa-oa

Why don't you just shoot me in the head
'Cause you know I'd be better off dead
If there's really no place in america
For a celebrity of the first...

You can't just be a founding father
When everybody needs you to be their father

Unison
Why don't you just shoot me in the head
'Cause you know I'd be better off dead
If there's really no place in america
For a celebrity of the first...

Why don't you just shoot me in the head
'Cause you know I'd be better off dead
If there's really no place in america
For a celebrity of the first rank.

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