Hold me in the river

I woke up late and found my liberty lost
It had been written down in law as a security cost
28 days - I'm presumed guilty
I'm sure as evolution that I wasn't born guilty

Hold me in the river till my skin turns blue
Slap me on the back and say "Now how do you do?"
They say "Eamon tell us how to keep our garden growing"
I say "Try lying on the grass thinking of Scarlett Johansson"

Throw me to the deck and count backwards from ten
Slap me round the face and say "Now do it again"
I'm all trained up, yeah, I'm ready for the ring
They'll be arriving in capes and leaving in slings

Come on, tick your ticker
Let me know you're alive
There's very little point in being here otherwise
Can you tell me now, what is this love?
If it comes from above
Why does it have to be so painful?