Excuse me ladies and gentlemen

Verse 1
Excuse me ladies and gentlemen, but the pilot's just dropped dead.
He was too fat and slow and all mixed up and disorientated in the head.
Is there anybody here, who can fly this plane instead.
If there is you better make your way up here or we'll all be dead.
Verse 2
Excuse me ladies and gentlemen, but the cockpit's full of smoke.
We'd better find the extingishers before we start to cough and choke.
Do you know where I can find a mask to help me fricken breath.
Has anything I've said to you been received.
Chorus
Ah- don't think we're gonna survive, Ah- we're not gonna make it home alive.
Ah- I think our numbers up, Ah- and I'm not making this up.
Verse 3
Excuse me ladies and gentlemen, but it seems we're in a slow descent.
I'm not sure if the auto-pilot's on, and I think the wings are a little bent.
Is there any hope for us if what I've said is true.
Just keep your belts on tight and watch the veiw.
Verse 4
Excuse me ladies and gentlemen, but it's just me again.
These things just happen to aeroplanes, every now and then.
Do you want to hear a funny joke before we hit the deck.
I know a few of you may object but, ah what the heck.
Chorus repeat
Verse 5
Excuse me ladies and gentlemen, but the pilot's left a note. He said he
Knew he was going to cark it soon, and he wants us all to cast a vote.
Is there anybody here who wants to jump into the drink,
Cause this plane will blow on impact before it sinks.
This plane will blow on impact before it sinks
I said, this plane will blow on impact before it.