Sleep between the lines

If this is the end
then I guess I'd better take one look around.
My heart is beating,
faster than I can count on both hands and this is my own dark secret.
I know you all tried your best.
Why couldn't I find a reason,
good enough to get some rest.
And after I'm gone.
Don't even think about it,
don't ever think about me as I am.
There was a time when I would laugh about it.
I thought It'd never happen.
I'm just fine.
A final warning,
if that's what this is I swear that I'm done.
Tomorrow morning.
I'll flush all the rest down I promise.
But deep down I know I'm lying.
I see it in my reflection.
In-between lines I'm flying but crashing fast.
Why couldn't this last.