A sad song about a girl i no longer know

I, I cant deny you're the reason that I cried every night
And I don't know why
But you've never found your way out of my mind
Participating in your games is something that will never make me proud
To be the one that you turned to the push and pulls and in and outs
They always left me filled with doubt but I can't say that I didn't love you

'Cus that'd be a lie, and I dont like being mislead
So I won't put it in your head that I'm the same
The tears that I cried, all the miscommunication
And the testing of my patience drove me insane

And now I wish I would've second guessed
The butterflies I'd get inside my chest
Convinced myself that we were meant to be
Oh why'd I let you walk all over me

When you got a clue
Of all the pain and sadness that you put me through
Point for me, 'cus evidently
You did just what I expected you to do
I let myself be vulnerable, I hold myself responsible
For letting you stick pins into my heart
In retrospect the younger me was too lovesick and dumb to see
That it was a disaster from the start

And now I wish I saved myself the pain
And looked from the perspective of my brain
I told myself that we could work it out
But it's too late to fix that problem now
Yeah it's too late to think about that now

And now I wish I would've second guessed
The butterflies I'd get inside my chest
Convinced myself that we were meant to be
Oh why'd I let you walk all over me