A comedy of hunger

I fall into deep shadows
As I always do at these times
Bringing my ego to point zero
Raping myself with anti pride
A vast comedy surrounding me
A massive transparent enigma
And a grey star on a bleak heaven
Should I laugh or cry?

This journey makes no sense
What pathetic life is this?
Whoever directs this comedy
Should come forth and die!
Look at me - you are nothing
Protect me - you're poisoned
I hate you - still I want you
I'm trapped in a comedy of hunger

Kill me now!
Raped with ignorance
The easy escape
The obvious solution
Damned with curses
Frozen with rays
Of anguishing frost

How can I forget that you let me drown?
You have no respect for me
How can I forget that you let me die?
I have no respect for you