Need to never

And it's been said to me
I hold a key I'll never see
And what I used to have was lost but now I found it
And without sympathy
The bleeding eye could never see
They're lining up to die the people I have counted
All the things I need to never
Do the things I want to do
Thought that it would change forever
But I never really want it
I used to try to be what I had seen that wasn't me
And what surrounded me was people that were clouded
And though it's hard to see just what I mean it isn't free
And what has grounded me
Was something that you doubted