Place to start

I don't have a leg to stand on
Spinning like a whirlwind nothing to land on
Came so far never, thought it'd be done now
Stuck in a holding pattern waiting to come down

Did somebody else define me?
Can I put the past behind me
Do I even have a decision?
Feeling like I'm living in a story already written
Am I part of a vision made by somebody else?
Pointing fingers at villains but I’m the villain myself
Or am I out of conviction with no wind in the sail?
Too focused on the end and simply ready to fail

'Cause I’m tired of the fear that I can’t control this
I’m tired of feeling like every next step’s hopeless
I’m tired of being scared what I build might break apart
I don’t want to know the end, all I want is a place to start