Blank stare

Death is part of this pail second
Reacting in chaos with only moments to spare
I'm still trying to figure the part
I played in this game, my own demise
How can we be reconciled from all this
When repetition has no strength or value
And all that I see is unappealing away
So tempting, decadence nails me
What risk and I taking for being alive
The fear I confront from existance
Carry me out now
I need more than solitude
Save me from myself deceiving
Lies angry tears are choking me
Forcing me down to my knees
Hearts pure intentions are failing me
Due to flesh in weakness
Integrity lost a portion of myself
Now drowning slowly
Forsaking, waiting to begin, my dying time
Burning from inside, wretched am I
Weak and in doubt, I still suffer
Go figure, I've never once budged an inch
Even though from my heart I'm still trying
Trying to see clear my vision
It fails me, returning to nothing
Demise, my own demise