Letter to a friend

There's a spy in the sky machine those eyes are keen to see
Tear me apart, my way, no casual affair deeper down it flashes
The work of a lier unsound, unstable, unseen
And my deplorable deed still festers with ruby eyes
Did you notice I died
And I'm born again to figure how we lost your heart
This needle in my conscience I cannot repair so will you ever feel right ?
I keep trying to feed my head
And make pretend
That no more will I bend
No casual affair.