Keep it even

There's a drawer in my house that I try
To keep closed but it's open. There's
A commitment that I made to be
Somewhere but it's broken. An oblique
Mantra in my head it lies there on
The floor like a bed that would
Collapse like a trap, if it was spoken
You gotta keep it even, even when
You're uptight

Even when you're happy
Even when you're reaching for some
Line I've had in mind, it's been re-
Pressed over time, so I'm breathing
Seduced by an excuse that could
Not be made but I'm speaking

There's a phone with a number that
I try not to call but it's ringing
For someone I've tried to keep to
Myself but I'm singing. It's logic
That's twisted and paraphrased and
Justified by a distance that separates
A bond, bound of persistence

You gotta keep it even, even when
You're uptight
Even when you're happy
Even when you're reaching for
That drawer in my house that I try
To keep closed but its open