Half past april

i thought
the ice is melting.
we could talk
on the lake.

not far from our house,
the park is wetter than yesterday.

i won't swallow my pride.
i know
i've been unbearable.
these past four weeks
have been wrong.

i can give you space.
i know what i want.
i can think of plans for us.
ruin, ruining our relay,
relationship.