Talking to a ghost

Do not fear, I come to repent
Stupidity, I didn't realize what we meant
A soul full of hate in my cross to bear
Your warmth and love I did not care
I do not want you to see me cry
I am at fault so I must die
Your home so final, your stone so cold
Your soft voice flows in the wind
To sleep per chance to dream
Bolt the door, bare the wrist
To kill, I know the risk
To slit, per chance to bleed
Oh holy night
You were so kind and beautiful back then
To please my every wish and whim
I remember you on that fatal day
In a pool of blood there you lay
Your peaceful eyes so calm, so calm
In remembrance I'll use the razor in my palm
In the darkness of lost dreams my dead hopes left to petrify
In a maze of my rotting aspirations
Back to the comforting darkness of death
Refrain
I felt real love for the first time in my life
My mind confused so you paid the price
I hope you forgive me for I can never
Liquid of life flows in the artery I must sever
The blood running down my arm makes me smile
For my own life is the ultimate denial
I'm sorry for loving you, so sorry
To die per chance to be free
To love per chance to be loved
Oh holy night
I will never see again.