If the animals could talk

On a big scale, who cares about the whale?
I'll never see one anyway or listen to the tales

In the grand scheme, what's another cow?
Just another piece of meat to me anyhow

If the animals could talk, they'd be cursing my name
I'd be getting death threats if they could write
If the animals could shoot I'd be hanging off a wall
They'd be getting me first so I gotta get 'em all

On a sad note, I wouldn't want to be a seal
My anniversary's coming up the mall has got a steal
On a fur coat that's a 100 percent real
Throw in that leather handbag, you've got yourself a deal

If the animals could talk, they'd be cursing my name
I'd be getting death threats if they could write
If the animals could shoot I'd be hanging off a wall
They'd be getting me first so I gotta get 'em all

I'm just a guy who doesn't take it serious
Don't think it's sad, but I'm only one man