Maria

She climbs a tree and scrapes her knee
Her dress has got a tear
She waltzes on her way to mass
And whistles on the stair
And underneath her wimple
She has curlers in her hair
I even heard her singing in the abbey

She's always late for chapel
But her penitence is real
She's always late for everything
Except for every meal
I hate to have to say it
But i very firmly feel
Maria's not an asset to the abbey

I'd like to say a word in her behalf
Maria makes me laugh

How do you solve a problem like maria?
How do you catch a cloud and pin it down?
How do you find a word that means maria?
A flibbertijibbet! a will-o'-the wisp! a clown!

Many a thing you know you'd like to tell her
Many a thing she ought to understand
But how do you make her stay
And listen to all you say
How do you keep a wave upon the sand

Oh, how do you solve a problem like maria?
How do you hold a moonbeam in your hand?

When i'm with her i'm confused
Out of focus and bemused
And i never know exactly where i am
Unpredictable as weather
She's as flighty as a feather
She's a darling! she's a demon! she's a lamb!

She'd outpester any pest
Drive a hornet from its nest
She could throw a whirling dervish out of whirl
She is gentle! she is wild!
She's a riddle! she's a child!
She's a headache! she's an angel!
She's a girl!

How do you solve a problem like maria?
How do you catch a cloud and pin it down?
How do you find a word that means maria?
A flibbertijibbet! a will-o'-the wisp! a clown!

Many a thing you know you'd like to tell her
Many a thing she ought to understand
But how do you make her stay
And listen to all you say
How do you keep a wave upon the sand

Oh, how do you solve a problem like maria?
How do you hold a moonbeam in your hand?