Bleeding in the snow

I’ve tried and tried
But I can’t find the comfort for the pain
I’ve tried to use the chemicals to wash it all away

Round and round when I come down
And everything’s the same
I can’t defeat the cycle
I can’t defeat the shame

I’ve become the only one who tears apart my dreams
I can’t control the fear I'll have to flee the scene
Imitate a damaged world
Never feel the pain
Throw myself away

When will I let go?
I’m bleeding in the snow
Will I let go? It’s all I’ve ever known
I’m terrified I’ll never be
Who I’m meant to be
Who I'm meant to be

Kill myself once again just cause I’m afraid
Why am I living a lie, a charade?
I cannot feel the grief inside, never ending suicide
Why am I alive?

When will I let go?
I’m bleeding in the snow
Will I let go? It’s all I’ve ever known
I’m terrified I’ll never be
Who I’m meant to be
Who I'm meant to be

I convince myself I’m strong
'Til the feelings overwhelm
I’m on my knees admitting I’m weak
Oh God, please set me free somehow

When will I let go?
I’m bleeding in the snow
Will I let go? It’s all I’ve ever known
I’m terrified I’ll never be
Who I’m meant to be
Who I'm meant to be