Watching your childhood heroes die

What have I done to deserve this?
I've gone about this all wrong
I found myself I'm afraid all that I touch I will fuck up
I've found myself face down just trying to catch my breath
Anxiety consumes my everything
My everything, everything, everything
And everything seems to get to me
And I'm trying my hardest to let it
Well, if I this time I spill my blood
Will it be enough to fill my lungs again
And will it be enough to carry me?
Cause I'm tired of watching my dreams die
My dreams die