Anxiety ridden

It scares me to death to think of what i have become,
And what a wandering soul i have become.
If i followed the beaten path instead of marching my way through my own.
I feel so lost in this world like i made the same mistake one thousand times.
I don't want to be a drone, a slave to the system that's caught so many others in its trap.
I can only hope to look back and see a life fulfilled.
Times of triumph, love and compassion.
But it's better to have lived, then to have never spent a day alive.
But will these choices finally come back to haunt me in my dreams?
This self loathing can only get me so far.