Matter of time

I'm half way home
But its still a long road to be traveled
And I know at any given moment
Things can go soar

From sweet to the streets on fire
Problems unravel
Still holdin my breath
Boots laced for battle

In a place
Where they would gladly
See me scattered all over they streets
Cause here my life don't matter

And thought they smile
Underneath those grins
They only waitin on they next chance
To try to kill me again

And don't be caught thinking out here
That your chances are slim
Cause there are those who have thought it
Who will never think again

Cause we're alone in this country
140, 000 Friends
And some 20 odd million
That ed see us all dead

You could only imagine our struggle
The odds were against
Where they are at all times
Playin both sides of the fence

And thought they havnt gotten me yet
I still aint home
And till then
Its only a matter time till I'm gone

Its only a matter of time for they get me
Though so far they missed me
Next time they shoot in my direction
Could be the one that hits me

Yeah the odds is against me
Lucks been wit me so far
I know deaths round the corner
But I don't know how far

And I aint trying to hear my #
Though it could be the next one called
Told my family I'd be home
But iraqs trying to prove me wrong

This weighs heavy on my shoulders
I can only be so strong
Sure we all gon survive
But we don't know how long

Started out with 60 minutes
In the game of our lives
And so far thank God
Everything is alright

From bein in the middle of the street
In the middle of the night
Where they are baitin they hooks
Castin and hopin I bite

And its too late
Here to be worried whether or not this is right
When its somebody on every corner
Ready to widow my wife

And I can feel it more than a lil bit
Impactin my life
Got me wantin to kill everything
That moves into my sight

Cause I can lose only once
And there are no rematches
And there is no 2 minute warning
Cant brace for it happens

So we face it
And come so close we can taste it
The one trip we take everyday
And hope we never make it

Cause deaths right behind us
And some of us will never shakem
But when we are challenged
We can not refuse to playem

So we knuckle the fuck up
And start swinging
Know its only a matter of time
But right now we are not leavin

Its only a matter of time for they get me
Though so far they missed me
Next time they shoot in my direction
Could be the one that hits me

Look here, I'm trying to keep it together
But things fall apart
Specially when I'm gon for so long
Losin feelin in my heart

Desensitized by my surroundings
Every colors turning dark
I don't see nothing beautiful no more
Only targets my reticle marks

Was emotional then emotionless
Now I don't feel a thing
And though it once killed me to kill
I'd gladly do it again

If only you could really understand
The state of mind that I'm in
Only then could you feel me
Only then would I make sense

If only I hadn't a been to
Some of the places I had been
If only I wouldn't a seen what I saw
Maybe I could feel again

But its too hard to separate
Whats goin on within me
Its just so much easier
To let hate be my remedy

So for everything I'm guilty of
Let the lord sentence me
If only I wouldnt a let everything
I been thru get to me

Things could a been different
But that is not my reality
And either way
It's only a matter of time for I'm outta here.