Confessions of a lesser known saint

Down the path of resistance
I find myself stumbling
Through my wants and my failures
Weaker than the thrill
Temptations attack our loyalty
Both the idea and institution
An equation of emotion
Too thick for calculation
But in the solution 1 and 1 are 3

So when you see me pass me by
(crossed my fingers
wish that you won't notice)
Even red letter days still end with night
In sleep we remain hopeful

Pay back to February
And heavy eyelids see plots unfold
To movie endings
Searching a bed room ceiling
Finding subtleties, finding flaws
But never answers
For what you did or what you do
I know the past still stings
But deafened ears waste apologies

So when you see me pass me by
(crossed my fingers
wish that you won't notice)
Even red letter days still end
With night and dreams
To wake and find another
So go to sleep
Turn off your ringer
(just close your eyes)
Afraid of what is left to find out
Until the daylight drips
In our eyes in sleep
we'll remain hopeful

There is nothing left to say!!!