Alive

Alive, I felt I was alive
The room shook under his nervous steps
I wished to not open my eyes, anymore

In my house everything was unfamiliar
Wasn't him, wasn't his fury on my bones
I was wrong I could make amend the problem that I had created
And I still hung, with my nails and all my memories
I was less than the idea he had about me
While I kept telling myself "I just have to wait for it to pass"

The hell was mine but I needed to
Believe, since I still breathed
I could never be more blessed than this, oh no

In my house everything was unfamiliar
Wasn't him, wasn't his fury on my bones
I was wrong, I could make amend the problem that I had created
When words hurt more than a whole night with him
My son shadow turns me back to forgive
With a fast rewind, I forgot any wounds on my raped mind

And your dreams, who knows where are now
And my dreams had fallen down to resist

In my house everything was unfamiliar
He was, and was his fury on my bones
I knew I couldn't make amend the problem that I didn't create
The main effort, to admit that I had really failed
That I'd known the most degrading misery
To discover that I could deserve more than a daily dread