Black umbrellas

I can't believe I'll never see you again
I only wish I'd had a chance to say goodbye
There will be more than a few short moments
Where this tears at the space beneath my ribs
I don't think I can shoulder the weight of your absence
I don't want to face a day without your light
But that's not a luxury I can afford

Though I'm sure I knew the sun would rise
Without you
I was never fully ready to wake up in a world
Where you were gone
I based so much of myself on the person you wanted me to be
When I got older

You were so selfless
That even now I can feel you
Urging me not to dwell
On your passing
You'd tell me just to pretend
That you decided to move away
But I can't lie to myself

Though I'm sure I knew the sun would rise
Without you
I was never fully ready to wake up in a world
Where you were gone
I based so much of myself on the person you wanted me to be
When I got older

I'm seeing death more and more in my life everyday
Like the guy who shot himself right across the street from where I live
And I'm can't get a grip on why bad things happen to the best people
But maybe that's why I have beliefs
So I can trust things happen for a reason
Life's not as bad as it seems just overwhelming
In the end everything's gonna be okay
I can't believe I'll never see you again
I only wish I'd had a chance to say goodbye

Though I'm sure I knew the sun would rise
Without you
I was never fully ready to wake up in a world
Where you were gone
I based so much of myself on the person you wanted me to be
When I got older