Walls are all i can turn to

I wait, but nothing is worthwhile
When I am worthless myself
These walls are all I can turn to
How can I care, when I cannot get out?
I wish I had died before this day
Its because I am nothing that I stay
Can I take control with these feeble hands of desperate greed?
That carressed without feeling
And in a fist-only ever held nothing.
The hands of me that tore down beauty
When looking for a mask of glory
And ran from the ruins.
Always rather face the abyss, than face the true anguish.
Its just easier to be pathetic
I have to leave, for emotion has left me
And either way is misery
I test myself with living
Crawling the line of unbearabilty
And I have to keep going
Now I know Ill never be moved by anything.
Sustained away from all in disbelief
I am numb with distance
My heart is missing
What keeps me alive is nothing.
I know the pain is endless
Though Im unconvinced of emotion
I have already died for nothing:
Graceless confession of the broken.